Today has been a mixture of snow and sunshine. One minute there are dark clouds with snowflakes streaming along with the wind gusts; the next minute, the clouds are parting to reveal lightened cloud edges with vivid blue in the background- and sunshine streaming through the breaks.
It reflected my day, even my week.
So many different things going on- family dynamic changes; new potential vocational venues arising; a late winter- condensing even more the springtime and spring activities, along with a daughter’s wedding thrown into the mix; many toils of sowing, and seeing others reap- without invitation to break bread together; improvement of health; illness; loved ones returning home from a journey; brand new cell phone on the fritz; the heaviest, most beautiful snowflakes- when the normal temps should be in the 60s by now; the smell of mud and fresh snow … to name a few~
Seems my emotions have been reacting to each situation, relishing each moment- happy, sad, wounded, joyful, disappointment, gladness, perplexed…. I have been challenging myself to ‘stay in the moment’- but it seems it’s caused me to be all the more variable emotionally.
‘Lord’, I venture in one of my spontaneous chats with Him- ‘one minute the sun is shining brightly- the clouds lift- my spirit soars…the next, I feel as if the clouds will never break, the cold will linger on and on, and my vision will be precluded by heavy snow’…
I am weary.
I meditate on Your promises. I meditate on Who You Are.
You remind me that I am not to judge things by my sight… but to Trust in You Who Is Trustworthy- Who Works Mysteriously, in the realm of the Unseen. You works in such dimension- I cannot see, and certainly in this life- will not understand.
The LORD is calling to my children to know this Truth as well. Hard as it is to wrestle with Truth myself- it is another thing to observe your child wrestle with Truth.
At this point in my children’s young adult lives- even though my mother’s heart cries to press in…the Spirit whispers to step back, give the child, His child, breathing space…rather wrestling space, of their own. Space and time in which they may have their faith strengthened one-on-one with God- the most enriching and empowering of all…
Our LORD- He works in process. He works beyond our measure of time or means. His timing is perfect- He is not in a hurry; He is patient, and asks us to be patient- to be still, to cease striving.
He likes to work ‘unconventionally’- in order, but unconventionally- it is a signature of His Handiwork to do this. Look at His chosen ones- flawed humanity, ripe for Him to be at work- and too thus for Him to be glorified. He does not leave His willing Beloved unchanged from the encounter- but stronger in faith, including a witness to share with others- and a compassion for others in same situations which drips of His fragrance.
So, perhaps the weather of my life will continue as it was today, this season- snowing with intermittent sunshine. But, may my soul continue to experience thawing and tending by the Son of God- and may I more and more trust in Him, rest in Him, grow in Him- and express Him through my life.
2 Corinthians 4:7-9
2 Thessalonians 2:13-14
Exodus 4:10I John 1:1-7