Rollercoaster

Life is such a roller coaster. 

Some are on continuous 'wild rides' with more frequent swooping ups and downs; others more a more 'hilly' ride; few have coastings with only a bump now and then. 

We are on a series of large hills, with swoops thrown in fairly regularly. 

My dad's emergent situation has improved, now we are addressing underlying issues.  Every day the plan changes, the outlook changes--- swings, swoops...

Most of you reading this know well about riding roller coaster lives. 

I am all the more thankful for my God- the One Who Does Not Change, the One Who Is a Firm Foundation. 

Yesterday, a friend sent me this Scripture:

I lift up my eyes to the hills

From where does my help come?

My help comes from the Lord

Who made heave and earth

God will not let your foot be moved,

The One who keeps you will NOT slumber

The Lord is your keeper;

The Lord is your shade at your right hand

The Lord will keep

Your going out and your coming in

From Psalm 121

I especially like "The Lord is your keeper.... The Lord will keep your going out and your coming in...

And, this morning,  today's devotional from Spurgeon's Morning and Evening.  May it minister to you as it did to me-  Indeed, my hope is built on nothing less~ :
"Looking unto Jesus." --Hebrews 12:2

It is ever the Holy Spirit's work to turn our eyes away from self to Jesus; but Satan's work is just the opposite of this, for he is constantly trying to make us regard ourselves instead of Christ.

 He insinuates, "Your sins are too great for pardon; you have no faith; you do not repent enough; you will never be able to continue to the end; you have not the joy of His children; you have such a wavering hold of Jesus."

All these are thoughts about self, and we shall never find comfort or assurance by looking within. But the Holy Spirit turns our eyes entirely away from self: He tells us that we are nothing, but that "Christ is all in all."

Remember, therefore, it is not thy hold of Christ that saves thee--it is Christ; it is not thy joy in Christ that saves thee--it is Christ; it is not even faith in Christ, though that be the instrument--it is Christ's blood and merits;

therefore, look not so much to thy hand with which thou art grasping Christ, as to Christ; look not to thy hope, but to Jesus, the source of thy hope; look not to thy faith, but to Jesus, the author and finisher of thy faith.

We shall never find happiness by looking at our prayers, our doings, or our feelings; it is what Jesus is, not what we are, that gives rest to the soul. If we would at once overcome Satan and have peace with God, it must be by "looking unto Jesus."

Keep thine eye simply on Him; let His death, His sufferings, His merits, His glories, His intercession, be fresh upon thy mind; when thou wakest in the morning look to Him; when thou liest down at night look to Him.

Oh! let not thy hopes or fears come between thee and Jesus; follow hard after Him, and He will never fail thee.

"My hope is built on nothing less
Than Jesu's blood and righteousness:
I dare not trust the sweetest frame,
But wholly lean on Jesu's name."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My Father

I am blessed with a great dad!  He is 87 yrs old and continues to be a very active, vital person.  There's many days when he has more energy than I do! 

Today he had to be rushed to the hospital though.  A scare.  We will see how things go. 

Part of my writing is to explain why I may not be on as much here for a bit again- and perhaps you will keep us in prayer as we go through this health challenge with him- (and while I try to self-manage my own health things).

I'm so proud of my dad.  He called right away when something was wrong.  I told him to dial 911 and that we would head to his house asap.  I called a bit after we left, and he had followed through- even having unlocked the door for the ambulance crew, and he laid down to be still and wait for them... 

For being a non-health/medical person, over the years, he has chosen to be pro-active about his health, and choices along the way-  this had made it possible so that when a crisis arises, he usually has more options than others in his position. 

He recognizes his changing body/limitations- and instead of digging in and fighting it, or ignoring it-  he studies about it, learns about options, makes choices, makes adjustments/changes, communicates, asks for help when necessary... It isn't easy, but he's done a good job of it. 

There's a lesson for all of us- we too have choices.  Even when it doesn't feel like we have many- we still do have choices.  It may mean we have to make a change, maybe do less, maybe do more...  But being pro-active as possible can be a great advantage. 

Meanwhile, tonight I will head to bed, wishing I could stay at his side, but surrendering his care to the LORD and thinking of these verses.
- Psalm 46:10 "Be still, and know I am God." 
-Psalm 127:2 "It is vain for you to rise up early, To retire late, To eat the bread of painful labors; For He gives to His beloved even in his sleep."
-Ephesians 6:13  ¹³ Therefore take up the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand.

Blessings-

Beauty focus

Having had many a day (weeks, months..) being homebound (room bound)... I understand how important it is to bring beauty in- since we can't go out to it a lot of the time.   And, even though we truly aren't there- we can take it in with our minds, and savor what we can.

Doing this- can benefit our well-being. 

I've been fortunate, in that my husband got me an iPhone (4S) this past year- so I can snap pictures here and there.  The pictures are available to me to pull up on my little screen- and I enjoy taking a look at them- especially during times of forced-rest. 

Recently, the idea came to me to share them with others -  which I've begun to do on fb and on Instagram ( #lymesurvivorthriver ) 

Understanding that some may balk at the pictures, or become jealous that I have been 'out'...still, it is worth a chance, and I wish that they will understand my heart in that I wish to bring some beauty to them, having experience 'cave life' for so long myself-  it is just good to even get glimpses of 'out there'. 

I do not have a fancy, expensive camera- nor am I a professional photographer... just someone who tries to catch life scenes when she can, with what she has- to share the moment with you~

Blessings-

Psalm 33:1

New American Standard Bible (NASB)

Praise to the Creator and Preserver.

33 Sing for joy in the Lord, O you righteous ones;
Praise is becoming to the upright.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

23 Months

I'm 23 months into treatment for Late-Stage Neuroborreliosis + 5 Co-Infections. 

And, a couple days ago- I 'saw color'.  

It's been emerging from at first, the bleak-blackness of this illness...it moved to shades of waxing-and-waning grey... and then some color started to press through here and there... 

But I was most struck by the intensity of color in my life again emerging more consistantly when I was making a stop at a local chain craft store.  Not only had I the joy of actually driving myself there- but when I walked into the store- I was shocked by colors!  (But not overwhelmed!) 

A few times over the course of the past couple years, I'd been into the store- but all energy focused on getting that one item, as quickly and carefully as possible.

This time my mission again was to get a single item (yes- on sale at 50% off!)...but I discovered that this time-  my senses where more open to accepting the colors and array of items all around the store, and- my energy at that moment was allowing me to actually walk the aisles (albeit, it wasn't a hug store, but you know it doesn't have to be a big store to be draining!)

Oh my- patterns, colors, do-dads, notions, fabrics, ideas... and people- simply going about life, seemingly without care...they seemed there because they were on a routine visit to get materials to work on crafts, get this- just for fun! 

It was breathtaking.   I wanted to shout to them all- 'do you have ANY idea how wonderful it is to be here!  To be able to take this all in!   To have the abilities and resources to make things from all these options!  Just to stand there, or to be able to push that little cart around the store?!'  

Why, I thought everyone there should actually be wearing party hats if they understood how incredible it is to be shopping at this place!  (Being able to shop any place, for any time, is cause for celebration in my world.)

I was at a Lyme Support Group meeting last night-  I shared about 'color beginning to return to my life'-  they got it.  Those that are along the road a bit farther than I...and for those back a few steps from him, I hoped it was an encouragement...  

Same with driving--  I actually drove myself to this meeting.  WOW!  Yep- drove myself there and back!  I believe it was my longest, driving myself, road trip I've been on in years! 

Now- I hesistate to share too-  in that some of you reading this may still be in that dark, no color, stage...please- know that I understand your pain.  But, my wish is that you will take encouragement in keeping at all of your protocols- don't give up, hang in there~  color is out there, and it can come back into your world too. 

In the meantime, bring color to your day- don't push it aside, but where you can find it- embrace it, soak it in.  For me, it was literally one color shade I would take in, enjoy-- usually from a magazine page....just to help me see through the black/grey... it was therapeutic~ 

Above all Dear One-  may the Light of the World, Our Lord Jesus Christ- bring Light to your soul...even when things look dark- there is color  (in fact the color black, is black because ALL of the colors are being reflected at one time-  the colors are there).  Let His light begin to break into that darkness, and illumine colorful shades to your soul, to your life today. 

So, what is the 'color of the day' for you?  Feel free to share it here~
Today-  'robins egg blue' comes to mind for me~

May the Creator of Light and Color, bring both into your day~

Blessings-

John 8:12
 Then Jesus again spoke to them, saying, “I am the Light of the world; he who follows Me will not walk in the darkness, but will have the Light of life.”

Fear

I have been blessed to be a part of a small group of women who've been going through the book, and study, by Carol Kent called:  "Tame Your Fears...and Transform Them into Faith, Confidence, and Action"  (NAVPRESS)

We've been meeting over several months- in part because at this point, meeting with a group once every two weeks seemed most do-able at this point for me, and along with a co-leader, I have been leading the study.

I figure, after dealing with the fear and anxiety that Lyme can bring- it would be good for me, and hopefully beneficial to the others.  

One thing about fear I've learned- it diffuses some to just admit it, and not try to hide it. 

Now, the fear that comes with Lyme, only those with Lyme truly understand.. there may be a nugget of 'natural' fear there- but a lot of the fear we deal with is because of the infections themselves, attacking our brain...probably some bio-chemical changes as well...  These fears need to be addressed by treating the infections, and getting our biochemistry balance back!

Still- there are plenty of fears out there that are natural fears that are magnified by the consequences of Lyme:  our well-being/lives are threatened, we are isolated, we are misunderstood, we are weak, we are vulnerable.... For these- there is HOPE- and to 'treat' these- we go to the LORD.

The LORD gives us His Truth to dispel the fear-lies that come into our minds.
The LORD is Sovereign, to dispel the fears that come with not 'being in control'.
The LORD is Counselor, to dispel the fears and anxieties we wrestle with in our minds and emotions.
The LORD Watches over us, to dispel the sense of striving, and to bring good rest.
The LORD give us advice/direction, to dispel confusion.
The LORD is Hope, to dispel hopelessness.
The LORD is Perfect Love, to dispel fear.
The LORD is Grace, to dispel fears of 'never being good enough'.  (By His grace, we are saved...)
The LORD is Near, to dispel loneliness/abandonment.
The LORD is Understanding, when no one else seems to understand.

I encourage you to make your own list, and include passages you find that go with the claim-  (It'd be awesome if you'd share that list on this post in the comments, to encourage others...)

The LORD_____________________, to dispel _________________________________.

His name, the Name of the Lord Jesus Christ alone is enough to dispel evil ones-  His name is powerful- and if we have no other prayer than that one- it is all we need, His name! 

The devil likes to come in and pile it on- especially when things are swirling around in our minds/emotions--  if you ever feel part of the fear you are experiencing is an attack-  just pray His name- the Lord Jesus Christ, out loud-  and see what happens!

In the book, Carol Kent gives a series of steps to help walk through natural fears we experience... once we find what 'triggers' the fear...  we can:
 
First- identify the fear

Secondly- admit the aspects of the fear that sadden us, bring us sorrow.  And, which aspects may bring sorrow to Our Lord

Thirdly- in brokenness, humility- bring the fear, our sorrows, grievances before the Lord

Fourthly- surrender these to the LORD; confess them, give them to Him; ask His forgiveness where necessary (if you've grieved Him, sinned in any way...)

Fifthly-  Make a faith-filled decision on how you will approach that particular fear in the future, practically... and Spiritually, begin by deciding that if I say I trust in God, I choose to act in such a way that reflects my trust in Him...

Now, this is my brief explanation- I do recommend the book/study to get much more~  Depending on where you are at in your healing process- you may want to just go through it to learn more about the steps she outlines- or to soak in the Scripture verses she highlights-

or, maybe there is someone willing to go through the study with you- reading it out loud- even if a little at a time...

In the meantime "Do not fear, for I am with you; Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God.  I will strengthen you, surely I will help you. Surely I will uphold you in my righteous right hand."  Isaiah 41:10 (NASB)

Blessings-

Foodie Idea

You, as I do, probably have multiple allergies and intolerances.  Gets tricky trying to find something to eat, let alone something tasty! 

We can have different allergies than each other- but I have found something that has been a decent meal for me, and it is quick and easy~   Perhaps the basic idea of it can be a help, even if you have to substitute because of your own allergies/intolerances...

First- I usually keep some kind of rice cooked up and on hand in the refrigerator.  Wild rice, I especially enjoy. 

In a small fry pan/sauce pan-  melt and heat coconut oil (about a tablespoon's worth, on medium heat), add one or two cracked eggs- and begin to cook them--

using a spatula-  break up the eggs, cut into pieces as they begin to cook.  Add to the eggs, about a quarter or half cup of the cooked rice-- keep stirring, chopping the eggs and rice to mix and heat thoroughly...  now you may add to it any leftover cooked veggies- or raw to heat through....

And/or, I have added cut up avocado....   I season to taste (usually salt and seasoning peppers- but you can add your own variety of seasonings..)

So that's the basics~  I think you get the idea of it- and you can play with it to make your own improvements..  Please let me know your favorites!  :) 

Even my non-Lyme husbands enjoyed this meal!  We had fresh asparagus as the veggie last evening!  and used an Indian Harvest brand rice called Kansas Medley. 

I'm so glad to be non-allergic to the Word of God- on it I may feast to my heart's content-- some passages so rich that I only need a little to satisfy me for a long time; sometimes I snack here and there; sometimes I am devouring chapters.... all at the LORDs banquet table- to which I am always welcome~  Bless Him! 

As a wise old preacher once said-  'He promised us a Banquet- not a picnic!'  :) 

Psalm 34:8
O taste and see that the Lord is good; How blessed is the man who takes refuge in Him!

Enjoy your time at the Banquet table of His Word today~

Blessings-

Settle You

I'm still camped in 1 Peter.  Just so much to soak in right now.

Chapter 5 verse 10-  "But the God of all grace, who hath called us unto his eternal glory by Christ Jesus, after that ye have suffered a while, make you perfect, stablish, strengthen, settle you."

Although this version is not my personal favorite... I do like the 'settle you'.  It means to 'restore you'. 

Oh Beloved- doesn't that sound wonderful!  To be restored.   Even sleep these days doesn't really give you a sense of being 'restored'. 

But one day- after our suffering a while- we will be 'settled/restored'.  Oh, that gives me a sigh of relief to even think about that....just that thought is strengthening, enthusing.

All these through the God of ALL grace.  Praise Him- what a God of Gifts is Our LORD! 

These days- I am up to doing some things-  today it is to go watch my son play in a high school Varsity Baseball play-off game(s)!  The last few weeks it has been one such thin or another, and time in between is basically spent in bed as much as possible to afford me being able to get to the next thing.  But, at least I have been able to make it! 

By the way-  I'm finding more an more reasons to use, and enjoy- coconut oil!  It is great for my skin after an epsom salt bath (restore skin mantel pH)... and it is a great hair conditioner (work into hair, let stand about 15minutes- than shampoo as usual)... Not to mention using it for cooking!  (oven fried sweet potatoes- with coconut oil to coat, and a dash of salt and peppers...also good to heat up cooked rice in a lil coconut oil- and toss in some cut up avocado!)....  Learning new ways to eat! 

May you be 'settled' today in the LORDs grace- may it bring you a deep sigh of relief, and satisfaction.... 

Blessings!